Happy New Year! I know it’s been a little while since my last post but will you forgive this single mama whose holiday hit her hard. While I want to just blame the overwhelming emotions that slapped me at the close of 2018, it was the taking care of two sick kids for two weeks back to back that completely threw me for a loop.
In any case, I will spare the details only because this year my main resolution is to keep moving forward, resisting negative energy and trying to stay in the now. I want to dedicate this first post of the year to an endeavor close to my heart, Women Who Thrive. As many of you might already know, the close of 2017 and 2018 in its entirety was characterized by the many changes my family and I have undergone since I became a pregnant, single mother. As if we did not have enough on our plates post launching little Lola & tots, my sister and very close friend decided to start a women’s networking group after feeling a dire need for representation and identification after attending many professional events. Not only did we not see many people that looked like us, but we also didn’t connect with anyone’s story since it spoke only about the rise and not the many falls that life can throw your way. As entrepreneurs, we craved listening to stories we could connect with and that’s how Women Who Thrive was born.
Here we are now, having decided to make it a non-profit organization, one week away from our launch event (details on our site) and I cannot help thinking about last year’s brunch, the first big event we hosted, where I was a last minute add-on as a guest speaker. The theme of the event centered around what it meant to thrive. At the time, only three months shy of my world having flipped upside down, I was there, in front of 40 or so women, sharing how I felt I was thriving. As I share with you my speech now, I can’t help but be transported to those sentiments and how, although I knew I was undergoing a personal transformation, I did not fully grasp how amazing my journey would be and continues to be. I know this has given me a true purpose… the clear-cut drive to raise strong women. To those women, who have lifted me up and kept me going having connected with my story, I’m grateful to you.
“Saturday, February 3, 2018
What does it mean to thrive? I guess for all of us it has a different meaning. Is it to become the first college graduate of your family? Is it to break barriers and shift ideas of what your role as a woman is? Is it to be a
business owner or climb the corporate ladder?
We all have our own ideas of what thriving means, but with a common underlying theme of learning how to overcome obstacles. We can all agree that in order to thrive, we must face pain and once you come face to face with these challenges, we become responsible for our own happiness, our own success.
Back in November, a month or so after announcing that we were expecting our second child, my husband of almost 10 years walked out of my life. He threw in the towel on the world we had created. Fast forward a few days, after having learned of his infidelity and of a child having been conceived as a consequence, I found myself in a daze of confusion asking myself what now?
Here I was, Here I am… a pregnant, NOW, single mom with toddler in tow, launching a business. Having limited financial resources, since as some of you entrepreneurs here might agree, blood, sweat and tears… and a LOT
of money go into these small business dreams we’ve immersed ourselves into. What was I to do now?
Of course, as a mompreneur, who has the time to figure it out?
What I knew for sure was this… I was not alone. In the days that followed my sister became not only my business partner, but a life partner, helping with my daughter. In the first few days, my best friend became my roommate. My mother became my rock, my anchor. My
girlfriends became my therapists. Every woman with whom I’ve shared my story shares with me my pain, helps me carry out the responsibility to thrive.
If it’s one thing I have learned from my experience is to believe in the clarity that comes from learning about our own strength, our ability to overcome. We have a responsibility to live the life we dream for ourselves.
Whatever dreams you might have, whatever goals you have set, take the leap and let go, trusting in your capability to succeed… allowing yourself the opportunity to indulge in a meaningful life with the purpose you have
designed.
Through my pain, I have attained clarity. The transparency I needed to write my next chapter. While my future is uncertain, I am not fearful. This pain has allowed me to embrace uncertainty and granted me the motivation to love myself more. It has granted me the gift of becoming a
different version of myself… a stronger, empowered woman going after her dreams with endless possibilities ahead.
I’ve come to the realization that many of us are so consumed in giving a lot more than we receive and whether that be a relationship or a job, ask yourself if it helps to fulfill you… or does it keep you further from achieving your purpose in life?
While my marriage has ended, I don’t feel alone. My daughters, my business, my family and the group of women that have and continue to show their support gives my life purpose. I look at my daughter and I see myself in her, this extroverted, fearless individual not afraid to speak her mind. I want to believe that my dedication to her has allowed her this confidence and I can only hope that
as she gets older… as she sees women empowerment and female support become an intrinsic part of her world… she wont be afraid to take a leap and thrive in the world she chooses to design for herself.
Thank you.”